MISSION CALL

Today, in a letter from the first presidency.... I got my call to serve in the Sao Paulo Interlagos Brazil Mission!! I leave on July 22nd. I couldn't be happier!!

Return

I haven't blogged in ages.... I find I enjoy blogstalking and reading about other people, far much more than I enjoy talking about myself. It's just the creeper within. Anywho, I thought I would make a short little blog, knowing no one really is gonna read it probably because I haven't blogged in so many decades, however, I will be posting a legitimate blog up here sometime soon.

Lessons Learned

So, in college and all its wisdom... you know... the atmosphere of a university... very intellectually stimulating. I have had a lot of good life lessons learned. I will share one now with my exclusive internet reading community:

-History Repeats Itself

Now I get really angry at this one, as any normal person should. However, all these normal people (myself included) are the idiots who don't learn from our mistakes. We study wars, we study relationships... everything goes in a pattern. I find it unequivocally frustrating... but it's also a little funny. We humans can be complete jack-asses. ha ha. There is my spiel.

Today. I lost. I lost hard.

Ugh..

Today wasn't great. I don't need to say a lot. But ugh.. I'm frustrated, annoyed, and confused. Not to mention... I love how everything comes to the surface at the same time. It's good because that way you have moments of nothing to worry about....However, you then have the moments where it's all on your head at the same time. Awesome. I just want a tiny bit of clarity...


Ok. The End.

Only Peter Never Grows Up

It's really interesting some of the things I've been forced to dwell on lately... I have had one of the very best Christmas breaks imaginable to me. I have spent time with my family, my new nephew, my brothers and sisters. I've been able to watch my family grow in size and maturity, in ability... it all still blows my mind at how things can change so much, so quickly. This has been my last Christmas at home before I serve a mission (hopefully leaving in May) and it has really helped shove some things into perspective. Family- they are a constant anchor. No matter what they are there, no matter the drama, no matter the mistakes, they'll be there to help. Friends- I have watched so many of the people I love go so many different ways this past 6 months. My closest friends have become people whom I've begun to have nothing in common with, but I'll always be their best friend. It hurts me a little every time I have to say goodbye to someone, or watch someone that so strongly owns a part of me or my history go down a road that I can't follow. It hurts to have to say goodbye to people who you'll never love less, but you may never see. I hate wanting to be so many places at once, be essentially so many different people, people that satisfy every part of my being. Although through all of this, I have realized that this is what growing up is. Deciding which of those people you truly want to be. You have to pick who you are, and let the rest of it go. No matter what the case, or sometimes who gets left behind. You have to take the responsibility of the life you want to lead. All the rest... becomes the scar tissue that makes a strong person. I have realized and hit a lot of ends in my life, whether they be forthcoming or something I have been fighting against for so long. Eventually I will look back, or run into the people that make up my past (which has already begun to happen) and be happy for what I have done, and who I have done it with. However, through all the ends that have come, I have found that some things are supposed to be fought for. Some friendships aren't easy, but when the other is fighting just as hard as you are; for those brief moments with that person, all the fighting becomes worth it. I sincerely feel as if I have hit the end of my childhood. All the dregs that I have held on too, some that I will never let go of, have come to the forefront of my life and I have had to choose what matters. For instance: I am now officially enrolled in "pre-medical" classes. No more fluff generals... ha ha. I'm almost a junior, and the rest of my life has hit fast-forward and I need to find the track I'm supposed to be on. This sounds really austere, bleak, and cryptic... but I don't mean it sadly. It feels to me like a melancholy separation of sorts... I have to pick my battles in life and I can't spread myself so thin. I feel like the number of people you touch in your existence, and the number of friends you have is something so many people constantly worry about. But I think I would rather sincerely touch 20 people, rather than brush by 100, leaving them in my wake. There are those people capable of touching hundreds of hearts throughout their life, and whether I am one of those people I don't know. But at the end of my Christmas break I have come to the conclusion that the best way to say it comes from Peter Pan. Peter is talking to Wendy and Mrs. Darling, and this is what he says:

"Would you send me to school?" Peter inquired craftily.

"Yes." - Mrs. Darling

"And then to an office?" - Peter

"I suppose so." - Mrs. Darling

"Soon I would be a man?" - Peter

"Very soon." - Mrs. Darling

"I don't want to go to school and learn solemn things," he told her passionately. "I don't want to be a man. O Wendy's mother, if I was to wake up and feel there was a beard!" - Peter

"Peter," said Wendy the comforter, "I should love you in a beard"; and Mrs. Darling stretched out her arms to him, but he repulsed her.

"Keep back, lady, no one is going to catch me and make me a man." - Peter

Must I be caught and made a man? ha ha ha ha... I guess so. Only Peter never grows up.

Ashley Greene/Alice Cullen

I am in love with Ashley Greene... That is all. Oh Alice.. what you do to me.